26 September 2018

The smug tut-tutter

There’s a chap I “knew” via an Internet group about classical music, and while we differed in the occasional exchange about social or political issues, we shared a number of musical enthusiasms, and he seemed nominally interested in my compositional work.


Some years ago he dropped out from the group, but we remained “friends” on Facebook.  For five, eight years (I dunno) our contact was infrequent.

Never, and I do mean never, in all that time did he make any comment about my musical posts on Facebook.  So:  zero interest on his part in me as a musician.  On the rare occasion when he would chime in, 1) it was always in response to one of my relatively infrequent politics-related posts, and 2) it was never to exchange ideas, but to act the corrective schoolmarm:  essentially “you're wrong,” “how disappointing,” variations on those themes.  Of themselves, nothing which would be out of place in an actual friendship.  But, an actual friend’s part would extend much broader than preaching about political remarks to which he objects.

This is not about bruised feelings (they aren’t) nor about only being friends with people who pretty much agree with me on all things political (I am not).  It’s the realization that I am not a person to this “friend.”  I’m just someone he enjoys expressing political disapproval of.  I am certain that he is an actual person; but from the nature of his responses, and their observedly specific triggers, to my own posts, any other person would be forgiven for wondering if he is not simply a bot.

I waited a couple of years for some, for any, interest on his part in my musical work.  As he has expressed none, his latest exercise in social media self-righteousness simply aided me in formalizing a decision which had been a low-impact question for 2-3 years.

Farewell, and best of luck.

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