Having at last finished the additive operation to the scores of Nostalgia Ain’t What It Used to Be, Down Along the Canal to Minerva Road, Jazz for Nostalgic Squirrels, Dark Side of the Sun and the Op. 197 Rahsaan Roland Kirk Fantasia, I am conscious of an achievement seemingly outsized to the mundane nature of the work. And yet, there was creative work involved in there, too, so let me not denigrate it as mere housekeeping. So let me acknowledge the accomplishment as being as grand as it feels. The What next? is clear enough: the need to set dates both for the two concerts, and for more rehearsals (at present, the only rehearsal in the books is this Wednesday. Today, as I listed all the above-mentioned pieces, it is borne in upon me how in fact, it is a bigger program than it needs to be. We’ll strike Snootful of Hooch and revive it at a later date. Having so substantial a portfolio of pieces for the Ensemble is obviously a serious musical asset.
So: rehearsal with five of the now six members on May the 7th. Once I finish exulting in the present victory lap, my musical mind is ready to take a few days off. Perhaps I’m just a father crowing over newborn twins, but I’m full of a feeling that Dark Side and the Op. 197 Fantasia are the best music I’ve written thus far. I am just so pleased with and so damned proud of them. This experience somehow sets me to remembering when I was in rehab after my stroke and my musical mind was champing at the bit to be about creative work again. At the time of the stroke neither White Nights nor the Symphony for Band was finished. I was full of a sense both of gratitude that my new life permitted me to complete those two projects and of renewed purpose: the simple fact that if I don’t write my music, there ain’t nobody else will. I was overjoyed to bring both the ballet and the Symphony to completion. So there is some similarity to my feelings this week. But I’m vividly aware of and rejoicing in a wonderful difference: In the spring of 2019, the Opp. 75 and 148 were (obviously) pieces, music I knew of already. Both Dark Side of the Sun and the Rahsaan Roland Kirk Fantasias represent a musical expression completely new to me, musical accomplishment of which I was completely unaware in the Before Time. So my pride and gratitude are deeper still. There are not merely personal but cultural reasons why it was granted to me to survive my medical “event.” And notwithstanding the challenges and uncertainty in my musical life which remain, I consider that today I simply do not yet know what pieces I may find myself able to compose in future.